Learning curve

As we deal with the possible issues B may have, I find I am learning. I am learning that you can't always put everything in a tidy little box and fix it. I'm learning that sometimes the people who are there to help don't always have an answer either (they are learning too). I am learning that I have to let go a little.
There may never be an answer, I don't have control and sometimes I need a break too. Sometimes this mommy gig isn't easy.
Sometimes we have to love our kids even more than we think is possible, at a time when they aren't acting very loveable (talking about my darling eldest daughter).
Sometimes I feel like someone is testing me, and I don't think I'm getting an A.

The biggest thing I'm learning is that I can't fix everything, but that is okay. I can't just take my child to a professional and have them give me a solution. This is a work in progress.

In fact this whole parenting thing is a work in progress. I will be there for my kids, I will love my kids, I just hope it is enough.

Attachment, etc.

We have our results! I am very proud to say that our girl is very, very bright. She scored so well on the cognitive testing. Not surprising, I already knew this (I am biased of course). However, not surprising again, there are some concerns.
I think her cognitive ability is what will help her overcome most of her school related issues. Unfortunately, she is going to have to work a lot harder than most of the other kids in her class to keep up. Some things, such as rhyming are very difficult for her to comprehend. Brennyn memorizes things that rhyme, but if you throw a new word at her, she just can't rhyme. We have ideas to help her work on this though, because she may also have a difficult time learning to read.
Again, right now she is trying and she can pick out a few words (but we are also realizing she has memorized these key words).

Basically, she really is doing so much better this year in school. She is concentrating more and socializing a bit better.
We have to remind her of personal space, proper behaviour, etc. and we will have to keep reminding her of this because it simply will not come naturally to her.
She also has attachment issues, obviously. There are also a few sensory concerns as well, and we may need to see an OT if they don't improve next year.

Brennyn missed out on so much in her first 2 years of life. I don't know why other children adopted at her age from her orphanage (and others) don't seem to have her issues. That really doesn't matter, because we are focused on our daughter.
She is one amazing kid, and although this has been a difficult road at times, I just love her so much. She is so very brave.

Off to Sick Kids this morning. Worked out well since it happens to be a PD day for my girls. Not sure how excited Avery is to be spending her day off school at Sick Kids with her sister, but the promise of a lunch out has helped!
I think it's good for Avery to see what happens when her sister goes to her doctor appointments, it's not all fun and games for Brennyn.

Busy weekend around here, tractor parade of lights (can you tell we live in a small town, ha ha) tonight, Santa Clause parade tomorrow night and I am coaching Avery's soccer team Sunday morning.

There was no coach for Avery's team, so her Dad volunteered. Only problem is that he works shift work and can't make a few games. Guess who is the fill in coach? Should be a very interesting game, since I really do not know much about soccer. Good thing it's only the under 8 age group.

Goofing around

Waiting

We are still waiting on the results of Brennyn's developmental/behavioural testing. This has been a very, very long process. Unfortunately, we have had to take a break from seeing the private psychologist for a month or two (partly because of the cost, not just her fees, but add the parking and the hour and half drive). She did give us some very helpful insight, and ideas so we are working on those.

Brennyn's teacher left us a message a few weeks ago letting us know that B was doing so much better this year (same teacher as last year who thought perhaps Brennyn had mild autism, etc.).
We are still concerned about how Brennyn will do next year when she is in school full time, but I guess we will cross that bridge next year! Still hoping we get some feedback from the infant and child development team. We know she did great on the actual testing, just not sure what all the behavioural forms we filled out will reveal.
B has come so far, she is counting to 100, and can even read a few words (she is in SK). As I have mentioned before, she still has trouble sitting still and does get distracted. We think her classroom many be a little too stimulating for her (it's very large, but only 20 students, and bright).

Our biggest concerns are also some of the quirks we love so much about her. She is the happiest kid, and overly friendly (yes, we know this is an attachment issue), she cares about everyone so much.
At the same time, we have to watch her all the time. She has always been curious and still is (stuck a chopstick in our electrical outlet, and yes we were in the next room, just never thought she would do that).
She is the type of child who normally would not run across the street because she knows that you have to watch for cars, yet still she has done it (saw Grandma and ran to her, another time it was her sister that she saw).
She also sits too close to kids, really doesn't understand the concept of personal space, and loves to touch everyone and everything.

The best way to sum this up is that Brennyn is 5 years old, but she is still 3 emotionally and behaviourally (she is also tall, and people seem to think she is the older sister). Yet, she is right on track when it comes to actual school work.
Honestly, everyone who meets B, loves her (how can you not).

Happy Avery and Lia day

Very special day for two very special girls (plus 1 little sister)!

Happy Avery Day

Six years ago we were waiting in a conference room in Jiangxi China with 17 other adoptive families from our travel group. We were one of the last names to be called. Mr. Tu placed you in my arms and I became a mom and we became a family.
I started to cry (a mixture of complete happiness and a little fear) and you started to cry (your tears were a mixture of a lot of fear, hunger and overheating).
You cried for three hours.
I remember your Dad telling me to take off some of your layers (it was 25 degrees in the hotel room, and you were dressed in 4 layers of clothes. We were in shorts and we were sweating). All I could remember were our social workers advice "don't change her out of her clothes right away, it is all she has that is familiar to her". I did not want to change you, but in the end I finally took away a few layers and fed you.
You woke up the next morning and smiled at us. You had your Dad wrapped around your finger at that moment. You are two peas in a pod!

I can't believe how quickly the last 6 years have gone. You are one smart, athletic, strong willed, play by the rules, old soul type of girl.

I love you to the moon and back a million times, Avery Fu!!

Halloween fun