We received another letter from China last week. Only, this time it was written by someone different. This letter came from another cousin (Avery's birth father's niece).
I really don't know what to think about this. There is a chance that I am too suspicious but this letter did mention something that caused me to hesitate.
I have e-mailed the original letter's author (who I believe is related to Avery's birth mother, but that's just a guess). I haven't heard back, however I am aware that e-mail in China is not always received.

I am not suspicious in any way of Avery's birth family. I am just wary of this "cousin". I am grateful that these people are reaching out to us (to Avery). To me, they feel like distant relatives, like your second cousin you don't see very often. I want them to be a part of Avery's life, after all, they gave her a beginning. I am the one who wants to thank them, although they have thanked us. Thank-you isn't the right word, I can't really find the words to describe how I feel.

I am also discovering that some of the initial information we were given by the searcher may have been incorrect. I believe now that Avery was the only child given up for adoption. I also know that her family misses her so much, and that's all I feel comfortable saying on a public blog.

We are at the stage with Avery right now where she does not want to discuss adoption at all (whether I'm talking about my adoption, her adoption or Brennyn's adoption). She even says "mom, I don't want to talk about this anymore".
I know that I went through that stage as well. Okay, so I went through that stage for about 10 years, but that's just the way I am. I was one of those kids who didn't want to tell anyone I was adopted and I certainly did not want to discuss it in detail. We did discuss adoption though, but not all the time.
I just don't want to push Avery too much, but I also want her to feel as comfortable as possible about talking to us.
It's also difficult to know if I'm projecting how I feel about adoption onto my daughters. For me, my parent's are my mom and dad. Yet, I am so happy about finding Avery's birth family and I want for her to be comfortable with this revelation. I still haven't really searched out my birth family (gave up after a month of half hearted searching).
Sometimes, wearing too many hats can be confusing (adoptee, adoptive parent, mom).