The sun came out

It was a beautiful, warm and sunny day yesterday. We could actually wear shorts again! It's been a very (and I mean very) rainy spring this year. The girls were so excited to visit their favourite park, the duck park with their friends. My friend has 2 children the same age as my girls (girl Avery's age and a little boy). Avery spend the afternoon playing with the little boy. She loved his bulldozer and trucks. The little boy has always loved Avery (it's so cute, he loves to follow Avery around). I am just happy when Avery plays with someone because usually she does her own thing. Although, she has never had a problem playing (bossing) her little friends around when they are on her turf! At school, she still does not talk to any of the other kids. Her teacher told me that some of the kids asked if Avery could speak! She still thinks Avery will grow out of it. I'm still concerned!

I'm behind on posting, yet again.
Busy with the girls! Brennyn has her first ever soccer game tonight and Avery's season opener is tomorrow.
Pictures to come.

UPDATE: It may have been cool and rainy, but the kids didn't care. They had a blast. Brennyn laughed non-stop, running up and down the soccer field. I think she thought the goal of the game was to catch the other kids, who cares about that ball. It is always so cute to see the little ones at their first soccer game. Nobody has a clue what's going on, they are more concerned about snack and playing. I love it!

Avery's class is going to the Elmvale zoo in a few weeks. The note came home in her backpack yesterday asking for parent volunteers. Avery, who really does not handle change well, found out that she has to go to school for the whole day (she normally only goes half days every day) and bring a lunch.

Avery also found out that Mommy is unable to go on the school trip because Brennyn has an appointment with the pediatric dentist at Sick Kids on that day.

Most children would be so excited about visiting a zoo.
Avery, on the other hand, was not a happy camper. "I'm not going to the zoo, I'm not bringing my lunch. I don't go to school for the whole day, I always come home at lunch time".

Avery is a routine kind of girl, and this trip is throwing her off. She is more worried about having to bring her lunch (she's never had to bring a lunch before). She would rather go to sick kids and sit around all afternoon while her sister waits for her appointment.

It would have been so much easier if I could have volunteered to go with her class, but that can't happen this time (rescheduling Sick Kids appointments really aren't an option). I really want to volunteer at my children's school, but lately, every opportunity has coincided with a doctors visit. It's so hard for a 5 year old to understand why her sister has to see so many different doctors!

Unfortunately for Avery, her mean mommy is going to make her go to the zoo!

I've been reading Rumour Queen again

I'm feeling a long winded post coming up, so be warned.

As an adoptee and adoptive parent, I feel the need to clarify that we (adoptees) are not one large entitiy. We are individuals, who have our own feelings, ideas, and outlook.
Yet, we are often lumped together, like we should all feel and behave a certain way.

Yes, I did search and find my daughter's birth family. I did not wait for her permission. She was 3 years old when the information that someone knew her birth family was droped in our laps. I could not wait to ask her opinion, the trail was hot.
I don't know if she will resent me for taking another choice away from her, or if she will even want a relationship with her birth family. Frankily, I don't know at this point how she will process being an international adoptee.
All I can do is try and be the best mother I can be to my daughters. I will be there to talk about adoption, and I will often bring up the story of their adoption.
I will introduce her to her birth family, and hope that over time, she develops a relationship with them. Again, I cannot force a relationship on her, that will be up to her.

As I've also mentioned before (and on RQ), it has been worth making the contact with birth family just to have an answer for when Avery asks "Why"? We are also fortunate to have pictures of her birth family. This is something that is priceless to an adoptee (see, even I am guilty of lumping us all into one big category sometimes). Now, Avery doesn't have to wonder what if her birth mom has hair like her, or if she looks like her sisters.

I am sad that it isn' likely that I will find Brennyn's birth family. She may be upset that we did not find her birth family, but we did find Avery's. Again, I can't control this and I am not Brennyn. I don't know how she will process this information.
Ironically, it would have been so helpful to know who her birth family is, just for the genetic aspect alone. I am sure that a member of her birth family has the same genetic syndrome Brennyn does. It is such a rare syndrome, and I bet they don't even know what they have, never mind getting treatment for it.

My brother found his birth family years ago. I barely searched for mine. Yes, I did do a facebook search once I had the name of my birth mother but that was it. I didn't really try.
I wished that my brother would find the peace that he needed when he met his family, but he didn't. I even hoped he would maybe respect my parents more (you would have to know the story of his birth family to understand what I'm talking about).

I've gone on enough about this subject, and I've talked about it before. It's a tricky thing, to be a parent. Always second guessing decisions, trying to make life perfect for our children, and doing the right thing. It's just that we don't always know if it's the right thing.

Also, just because one is an adoptee, doesn't mean we have all the answers either. Different circumstances, different backgrounds, different lives. Yes, we should be open, and able to discuss adoption, just don't put us all in one big category.

I crossed the finish line

Well, I can cross that off my list, first half marathon complete. It was a wet, cool and windy day in Mississauga but over 3000 people showed up to race!
It was amazing seeing so many runners, of different ages. I even saw an 80 year old Grandfather running (he advertised his age on his shirt).
It was so inspiring. So many spectators as well (even in the rain), cheering you on as you ran. Some blasting music, some waving pom poms, some carrying hilarious motivational banners.

Came home to find bright yellow happy face balloons and a cake waiting for me. Blair and the girls surprised me, and a few very happy tears were shed.

Am I crazy

Ack, the big race is almost here. Tomorrow morning I run my first half-marathon. It seemed so far away when I signed up for the half-marathon running clinic. How can it be here already? I'm just a little nervous (make that a lot).
There are thousnds of racers signed up for this paticular race, The Mississauga Marathon.

Oh, and the weather, not looking so great. Rain and wind. That's the gamble of running in Canada, there could be snow, rain, wind, sun, heat, hail. You never know!

Okay, ipod is charged, going to lay the clothes out, attach my racing bib to my shirt and leave at 5:30 in the morning.

I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!

Pirates and Wrestlers

It seems a Pirate and a Wrestler have invaded our house while we were away!

A few pirates, some drinks and lots of fun

Had to post a picture of my husband and his fruity drink (just fruit punch in his case, but nice and tropical).
I'd love to say that my drink was just fruit juice too, but that would be telling a great big fib.

Home again, home again

Back from the high seas. Had an amazing vacation in the hot Caribbean sun on the Crown Princess. Missed my girls so much, but they had fun without mommy and daddy for a week!
Seriously thinking about taking them on a cruise in a few years. I think they'd love it.