The girls

Had some fun with Brennyn's hair again. I'd take fun pictures of Avery's hair, but she won't let me near her hair, I have to bribe her to comb it.

Oh, and this is the cake we picked out for Blair's birthday, which we ate on New Year's (9 days after his actual birthday, Christmas was crazy this year so we didn't have a chance to do the cake thing until then).

Finally some pictures

A few pictures from our Niagara Falls trip, including the view from our hotel room, some crazy people walking around the falls in snowstorm, and a picture of me actually dressed up.

I know, still no pictures of the girls. I really should charge the battery for the camera and upload some.

So, Blair and I are thinking of booking a cruise for our 10 year anniversary this fall. I have been saving up for a dining room table for a couple of years but we've decided to use that money to vacation instead. I've only wanted a new table since we got married, but I guess I want a vacation more.
Okay, also my girls tend to be a little destructive and I would hate to spend money on a table for it to be scratched and dented in the first month (trust me, this would happen in the first day).
I do have a table (I keep it covered with a table cloth at all times, it was my parents table when I was growing up and it has all the scratches and dents from my brother and I).

We are also very fortunate to have both sets of grandparents who are able and willing to look after (SPOIL) our girls. We really don't have a lot of extra money so we'll be looking for the cheapest possible cabin (no captain suites for us, ha ha. We're inside cabin all the way, who needs natural light anyway). It's the airfare cost that is affecting our plans. I remember when you could fly to Florida for $200.00, not so much these days, yikes!
We just feel that it's too much money to take the girls on a cruise when they won't even remember it. Plus, I'd spend all my time worrying about my very active, climber of a 3 year old!
Also, it is kind of a milestone anniversary (gah, how can we be almost married 10 years. Seems like we were planning the wedding just yesterday).

One day I will post pictures again!
In the meantime, Avery had a surprise for me this morning. I was talking to my mom on the phone and Avery was shouting "Mom, you have to come see this". I hung up the phone, thinking World War 3 was breaking out in Brennyn's bedroom. Imagine my surprise when I see Brennyn's bed made, complete with her favourite stuffed animals on the pillows.
Avery had made her sister's bed, all on her own. She was so proud, as was I!
Should I also mention that Avery did a much better job than I do normally.

It was one of the nicest surprises I've ever had!

Have to record this before I forget it:
Brennyn was crying today and she said "you make me happy mommy, Avery make me saaaadddd". Avery and Brennyn had been arguing over a toy or something and Brennyn started crying.

A few minutes later I was buckling her into her car seat and she said "no more tears mommy, my tears are inside my eyes now".
"I happy again".

Of course once we were in the restaurant (went with a friend to a Thai/Filipino restaurant), Avery was on her best behaviour and Brennyn, well not so much. As soon as we sat down, Brennyn loudly said "where's the food mom, I want the food". Thank goodness my friend knows the owner (and it's a very small restaurant too). Brennyn was saying hello to everyone (again, small place and only 2 other people were there).
Once the food was done, she was climbing the walls. I think I forgot she is only 3, and perhaps she needs to be a little older before we really start frequenting restaurants.
My friend (who is Filipino with no children but loves kids, all the filipino ladies/kids call her Auntie or Tita) kept saying how busy Brennyn is. They are all used to hanging with Avery, who is so quiet, heh heh. I love that my kids are so different, keeps me on my toes!
We still had a fun time and ate some amazing food.

Winter

It's a little cold outside these days. I know, I know, I live in Canada, what do I expect in January? It's really, really cold though.
Blair took the girls tobogganing yesterday. They loved it, but couldn't stay out too long. Actually, Avery would have stayed out all day, but Brennyn isn't a cold weather fan. Avery loves winter, she loves the snow, the cold, everything about it.
I don't mind winter. I just don't enjoy the snowstorms, if I need to go somewhere.

Went cross country skiing yesterday, first time in about 20 years. It was so much fun. When I was a kid, my mom used to drag my brother and I out cross country skiing. I hated it, of course I pretty much hated any physical activity in those days. Yesterday, it was beautiful, gliding through the woods with the snow on the trees. Can't wait to go again, once I regain the use of my upper arms.

Changes

I gave my 2 weeks notice at work today. I was actually emotional about it, I don't know what is going on with me, but I never used to cry or get sappy. Now, I cry at commercials. Anyway, the issue of working is something I have struggled with. I was only working part-time so I felt that the scheduling and time management would not be an issue.
I've worked for this company for almost 10 years (with a little parental leave thrown in now and again). I know it was only a retail job, but it was still 10 years, most of those years were full-time management.
They were great at working around my schedule, once I became a mother. It's just that lately, I haven't been able to give 100% and that isn't who I am.

I guess this forces me to start thinking about the future. Once the girls are in school full-time I am going to have to reevaluate what type of work I'd be interested in. Perhaps a return to school one of these days??

Brennyn loves her big sister. She needs to know where Avery is at all times. Last night at dinner I had just finished telling Avery that she was about to leave the table and spend a little one on one time in her room (wasn't the best Avery and Mommy day, let's just leave it at that). Brennyn got down from her chair and stood beside me to say "MOM, leave my sister alone. You being mean to my Avery". Hard to not laugh. I explained that if Avery would kindly stop picking up her mashed potatoes with her hands, I would probably be a little nicer to be around.
Brennyn loves to tell everyone that "this is my sister Avery", even if she is talking to her Grandparents.

Most of the time Avery loves her little sister. Today, Avery even shared her purple freezie with Brennyn. I didn't even have to ask her, and Avery earned the freezie from her coach at soccer.
Avery was very upset that Brennyn wasn't in her gymnastics class this year. I actually prefer that they are in separate classes, but that's just me. Avery would love it if Brennyn ends up in her class in school next year (there is one split JK/SK class.

EDIT: So, 1 hour after I posted this Avery kicked Brennyn square in the nose with her pretty little white pointy dress shoes (do I have to add that it was on purpose, while I was watching). Brennyn had blood dripping down her chin, both girls were crying. I'm still not sure if Avery was just crying because I got her in trouble or because she felt bad, the jury is out on that one. Sisterly love, what can I say.

Just got home from a mini-vacation to Niagara Falls. Perfect time to go if you like things quiet. There was nobody at the Falls when we went for a walk on the Wednesday, although that could have had something to do with the 20 cm of snow that was falling. Blair and I chuckled to ourselves, we drove an hour and half south (from the snow belt where we live) to the area of Ontario where it hardly snows only to be stuck in a snow storm. It was so beautiful to watch the snow from our room (we were upgraded to the 33rd floor with a fallsview room), knowing that we didn't have anywhere to go.
Back at the homefront, we left my parents with 2 sick children. I felt so guilty, didn't realize how sick they were. Honestly, they weren't that bad when we left, I even sent Avery to school that morning (which also made me feel guilty since I'm sure she has now infected her entire JK class). Just hope my parent's don't come down with a case of the flu.

Off to the allergist today, hoping for some answers. I think Brennyn has now seen an allergist, dermatologist, geneticist, surgeon, pediatrician and our family doctor. I often think how lucky it is that we live in a country with such great medical resources.

thoughts about my children, long post ahead

Brennyn is changing so quickly and growing up before my eyes. Avery is too, but we notice it more in Brennyn just because she started out so behind. The first thing people comment on is her speech. She has caught up to where a 3 year old should be. Yes, some words are difficult to understand still (to an outsider) but for the most part, she is there.
Yesterday, Avery had a massive temper tantrum (yes, she may be turning 5 in a month, but let's just say she has a very strong will and I don't foresee temper tantrums disappearing anytime soon). Anyhoo, I put (dragged) Avery to her time out spot with Brennyn running behind us asking "Avery, what's wrong". "Avery don't cry, what's wrong". "Mommy, you no put Avery in time-out, she's crying". I would have been laughing if I wasn't so busy dealing with Miss Avery. Brennyn was so concerned about Avery, and Avery finally yelled at Brennyn to just leave her alone (see above statement about temper).

Brennyn is also suddenly in to hugging. She wants to hug all her friends when it's time to leave teddy bear school. I told her that all her friends don't always want hugs so she should ask them first. Brennyn looked at me like I was crazy and said "I don't kiss, just hug mommy" (as if that made all the difference). She said "I only kiss mommy, oh and Daddy".

It will be very interesting to see how Brennyn does at school next year. I hope she has the same teacher as Avery does this year. That teacher will be in for a surprise since Avery hardly ever talks at school or plays with any of the other kids. Brennyn wants to play with everyone and everything all the time. Avery is okay with not playing with the other kids, she doesn't think it's a big deal. She's into her own thing. It's my fault for always making a big deal about it. I was always shy in school but I didn't have a problem talking with kids I knew. I would never speak to the teacher though, whereas Avery has no problems answering questions. I think she just doesn't feel comfortable with the other kids. She won't talk to her bus driver either though, so who knows. I'm really hoping she grows out of it eventually.
Her teacher did mention that Avery seems very bright (which I've always known, not just because I'm her mom or anything and I'm biased) so I wonder if she feels like the other kids aren't on her level?? I know, I'm so reading too much into this. I have a tendency to over analyze everything.

As I've said before, I struggle with being shy and I don't wish that particular struggle on my child. However, I should also know how much it used to bother me that my mother would make such a big deal about my shyness. It never helped me when she would try and force me to not be so shy. You would think I would know better to not do the same with Avery.

Birth Family

I don't talk about this publicly much. I do belong to a few private chat groups, but really there aren't many families with the same situation.
I sent a package (letter and pictures) to Avery's birth parents, in October (or was it September, time is going so quickly I can't keep track). I haven't received a response and am now wondering if they even received the letter. I had everything translated to Mandarin, including the address but I failed to include a self-addressed envelope to make it easier for them to send something back.

I really would like to maintain contact with Avery's birth family and I do plan on a homeland visit with the girls within the next 5 years. I would very much like to meet Avery's birth family when we return to China. I'm just hoping they feel the same way. I assume they do, since they made it fairly easy to find them (there was an obvious trail).

My other concern is that I don't think we will ever find Brennyn's birth family. I just hope she doesn't feel slighted because we did find Avery's. Unfortunately, Brennyn was left at a major hospital in a huge transient city. Yes, she does have distinguishing features but her birth family could have been from anywhere in China. Brennyn is also not Han Chinese, and I am beginning to suspect that she may be of mixed race. It's difficult to determine this because Brennyn also has some genetic issues that may be affecting her features as well.
The genetic issues are also what make me wish that we could find her birth family. We would be so far ahead of the game if we had some genetic information (an indirect quote from the genetic doctor). It's out of my hands, as much as that pains me.

We are very lucky to have found the information about Avery's birth family, and I am so very thankful. I live in the same province as my birth mother and even have a name but still have not found her (didn't really try, but that's besides the point). It is amazing to me that Avery was born in this small village, half way around the world and we now have pictures of her birth family and their house. Perhaps I should just be thankful for that.